I haven’t posted much of late because, well, I have no focus or motivation. I’m not really depressed but not really living either. More surviving hand to mouth. A gray existence without any real hope, dead boring actually. Oh there are bright spots, a friend to see, therapy and an occasional good time with Lyne. But the changes I long for aren’t going to happen most likely. It’s times like these that I understand the yearning some people have for an apocalypse, anything to end their stultifying existence. Me, I just don’t care any more.