Digging Around In The Basement Of My Mind

I have any number of questions on who I really am. How well do I know myself? Not well often seems to be the answer. I know, or think I know, that I am not a man though I am male bodied. I am comfortable in female clothes but I also know that even if I were females bodied I would tend to dress rather butch. But I am I really transgender? Maybe I am just a not overly flamboyant drag queen. On the other hand I do so want to alter my body with hormones to be more female in appearance, or do I? Am I using my current financial difficulties to avoid making a real commitment? I don’t think I am but I’m not sure. I need sleep now but I want to explore this more tomorrow.